2.05.2010

How do you stay confident?

Ladies, I am facing some demons right now. Some demons within myself that I am having a tough time kicking them out.



2 years ago I was the most confident person you would meet - very arrogant - I knew I was pretty and I knew I could have any thing I wanted without working super hard to get it.

Over the past couple of months all my confidence has disappeared - right out the window - bye bye confidence. I used to be so comfortable in my skin. I would slap on that bikini and flaunt what the good Lord blessed me with. (Stretch marks and all).

Now I just shrivel at the thought of even wearing shorts because I feel like my thighs are to big or my muffin top is to fluffy today and my hair just looks like I woke up (even after working on it for 2 hours). I find myself wearing more Tshirts and baggier pants instead of cute tops and skinny legs. I wear more tennis shoes than I do heels. I just don't feel pretty.

I don't know what happened - I used to have more confidence than I knew what to do with. My sales numbers at work were great now I struggle every month to come close to my goals. I constantly find myself looking in the mirror rather than just assuming I looked good.

If I see a great looking girl on my boyfriends facebook friends list I instantly become jealous where before I used to have the "F*** him" attitude and the "there are tons of guys in line to date me" response. But now - I grow with anger and I yell at him all because of my insecurities.

How do you ladies handle this? Or do you handle it? Are you in the same boat as me? I am having a super hard time right now and I am looking for all opinions and advice. I want to get the old Meg back - but I'm starting to think she's to far gone to bring home.


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